It’s 15 years since I had my first baby, so when I found out number two was coming it was an amazing surprise. You can read about that here.
However, one thing I had not bargained for when Seth was born in February is how much I had forgotten from the first time around.
He’s now six months old and here are seven things that have taken me completely by surprise so far.
Breast feeding is hard
Having done it once I just thought it would be a total breeze to breastfeed again, it really wasn’t.
So much so, in the first week we had a breastfeeding support worker around to help. What I hadn’t realised was that he had to learn to do it as much as me. We got there in the end but it wasn’t easy and it involved lots of trial and error.
You have no time to yourself
If one more person tells me to sleep when the baby sleeps I may just swing for them. In reality when the baby sleeps you eat, get dressed and if you’re lucky you may be able to have a shower or put some washing in; there’s no time for anything else and especially not time for yourself.
The washing
While I was pregnant with Seth I kept saying to my husband (a first time dad) one things I did remember from the first time around was the washing machine being on constantly.
‘But why,” he would say. ‘He’s only little.’
‘ I know,’ I would reply. ‘I can’t remember why there was so much.’
Now we know, of course babies poop, puke and generally get every item of clothing dirty. It’s not unusual for us to have three changes of clothes before lunchtime.
The recovery
Pregnancy alone takes a toll on your body and that’s before you go through labour and delivery. I had not anticipated how exhausted I would be and how long it would take me to recover from childbirth. I was in pain for quite some time after giving birth even though I was lucky to have a very straight forward delivery.
The tears
I literally burst into tears at least twice a day for the first four months of his life and I pretty much do the same now, two or three times a week.
The heavy responsibility of looking after a tiny person 24 hours a day is often overwhelming and combine that with a huge bucket of hormones means I’m an emotional wreck most of the time.
Oh the love
I had genuine concerns of how I was going to love another baby like I love by first boy. I thought I only had a certain amount of love to give and I’d used it all up.
In reality, of course, you have unlimited love and as soon as I had my baby in my arms all fine and the love was overwhelming.
Colic
Oh my God. I’m sure Harry had a bit of colic and Seth hasn’t had that much. However when it did come it was like the windows were shaking with the volume of his crying.
It really is very hard to deal with and Stuart and I definitely had to tag team it so that we could cope.
And this is why single parents who deal with alone are just super heroes.
So there it is, the last six months have been an absolute roller-coaster of a ride and throw in a world-wide pandemic and it’s been quite the experience.
What I do know though, having done this all before, is that each stage of a child’s life holds something wonderful and I just can’t wait to move on to the next.
What has surprised you most about being a mum for the first time? Or are you a second time mum and like me had forgotten some parts of it? Feel free to leave me a comment below.
There is four years between my two and I had forgotten second time round too. It was the sleep with me. Emphasised by the fact that the second one did not sleep as well as the first!
My third is almost 2 now but I can relate to all of these. luckily we didn’t have colic but he was a whiny baby and needed a lot of carrying!!
Yes, yes and yes again! My youngest is 10 months and only now am I starting to get some time back for myself 🙂
The lack of sleep! Oh the horrors it wreaks. My small boys is 5 and every now and then broodiness sets in and I dream of having another (impossible as we’ve taken drastic preventative action). But trying to remember the lack of sleep soon sets me right.